Liz smith on Madonna and gaga

WHAT THE hell kind of name is Lady Gaga, anyway?!"

That was Madonna, squaring off with Lady G. on "Saturday Night Live" last year, in a segment that should have been much funnier than it was. Both stars did the best they could with the material, but the real sport was simply seeing the two of them together – The Empress of Pop and the current Queen.

The media is constantly comparing M and G. And naturally placing Madonna in the "envious older star" category and Gaga as the "image-snatching copycat." But even so, fans of both are dying for the singers to collaborate on something. 

"Sources" say there could be a video pairing, like the one Madonna did with Britney Spears and Gaga did with Beyoncé. (Although it might be best if Gaga didn't kiss Madonna at any point. It's sort of a pop music urban legend that Madonna and Britney's kiss at the MTVAwards was the beginning of Britney's downfall. It was supposed to be Madonna "passing the torch," but the joke is "she sucked the life from her!")

Now, a video or a song is always possible between M and G, but the next bit of gossip? Don't dress and let's consider the saltshaker. There's a rumor that Madonna is planning her own biopic and that she's chosen Gaga to interpret her life.

Ahhhh … first of all, Madonna is one of those always- looking-ahead kind of people. She just turned a youthful 52, and I doubt she's thinking in terms of biopics or autobiographies. (When she turned 50, I asked her if she'd ever retire. She said, "I will when you do, Liz!" So we agreed to be the last gals standing at the rodeo.)

Second, she's deep into her directing project – the movie about the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, "W.E." This has consumed her more totally than anything she has ever attempted. Music, videos, her past life, her "rivals" are the last thing on her mind.

Third? Gaga has already been so closely associated with lifting many aspects of Madonna's image, I don't think she'd play into that by playing M onscreen. 

But stranger things have happened in showbiz (Sly Stallone's big comeback in "The Expendables!) so we never say never.


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